Beddy Bye For Bianca
by a440
Summary: Desperate to overcome her insomnia, Bianca offers 7000 to anyone to cure her. Guess who wins it though .


BEDDY BYE FOR BIANCA

The Beverly Hills Teens stand registered as the trademark of DIC (don't ask me what it

stands for) Productions, all rights reserved.

Cue Bobby Lewis' Tossin & Turnin' if you will, while we pan downward on Dupree Mansion, where inside, the spoiled diva known as Bianca Dupree was-for the 13th time-having a hard time trying to sleep. And no matter which way she tried to lay down, the result was the same-total insomia. And night after night, it was always the same, red eyes, spending every hour trying to sleep, trying every method to sleep-but couldn't. Finally, one morning, after one such sleepless night, she said testily to Wilshire Brentwood, "Wilshire, I can't take another night of insomnia! I've SIMPLY got to cure my lack of sleep beofre I turn into a reckless beast!"

"And you definitely look beastly all right," agreed the right hand teen. "I'll break out the online list of doctors for the cure of sleeplessness."

"Ugh," grunted the spoiled diva, "hang that; I tried all those duck doctors before as well and even they weren't doodoo squat. And I most certanly refuse to try sleeping pills, as they can be habit forming. Wilshire, I've reached the end of my rope! SOMENONE'S got to know just how to help me out and desperate times call for desperate measures. And right now,it's time to call on the last line of resort."

"Duck doctors?" asked Wilshire.

"Quacks," replied Bianca.

Business as usual in The Teenclub, with much of its denizens doing their rituals of swimming, eating in the cafe, trying to dance the light fantastic, playing polo, tennis, dating, skiing, surfing, etc. That is, until on all the high definition screens located all over TheTeenclub came alive with a broadcast from the KBHT TV and radio station, hosted by the gossip extrodennaire, Brenda "Switchboard" Andes.

"Salutations, all you members of The Beverly Hills Teenclub," began Switchboard, "we've got quite a truckload of news, and an exclusive at hand; it seems our number one diva, Bianca Dupree is offering $7000 to anyone in the club that can cure her insomnia. Good luck to the experts in the field that moonlight as somnambulist chasers eager to grab the 7K, all in the name of ensuring beddy bye for Bianca."

In the ice cream parlor of The Teenclub, Chenel Spencer, Troy Jefferies, Lark Tanner, Brad "Radley" Coleman, Pierce and Jillian Thorndyke III and Chester Mc Tech had seen the broadcast.

"Humph," scoffed Chenel, "I wouldn't be surprised. Why after all that time, would she be turning to us for help? She doesn't deserve it after the way she's been a brat. What did she ever do but whine, scheme and worse?"

"You got to admit," said Troy, " she wasn't doing a lot of it of lately. Besides, how bad can trying to win $7000 be?"

"Bianca may be all you listed," added Lark, "but she's a Beverly Hills Teen, just like me and you, for the sake of our show. And besides, it's something to do for a diversion, from standing like zombies doing the same old dull thing."

"We've been doing the same old dull thing for years," stated Radley. "Why break tradition?"

"In these inflationary times," said Chester, "$7000 is something that shouldn't be passed up. I could invest it in new lab equipment."

"I could use $7000," said Pierce, "to keep Jillian here out from my hair for a year."

"You would, eh?" scoffed Jillian. "I'd use that money for something valuable."

"So would I." said Lark. "and I say let's make a bet, that whoever's the first to win that challenge will get, say, a steak meal at La Crepe."

OK," said Troy, "but it's going to be me most likely to be the winner."

"Sounds like me," said a matter of fact Pierce.

Reluctant to a tee, but looking foward to a steak luncheon at La Crepe, Chenel was right now she and Bianca were in one of the Teenclub lounges where the former said, "Listen, anyone tell you one of the best ways for sleep is hot milk?"

"Didn't think of it then," said the spoiled diva, "but I say you're wasting your time; that never works."

"Now let's not think like that," said Chenel, who handed Bianca a cup (solid gold, to keep with the Beverly Hills motif) of milk. "Try that."

Bianca did but even after an hour passed, she had yet to drop off, saying, "I told you it wouldn't work."

"You got to give it time," said Chenel. "I know it always works for me-and I'll show you."

So saying, she took a cup with hot milk and drank from it, and after time had past, she was getting drowsy in half a tick, saying as she yawned, "See? I told you...," before she dropped off into slumber on one of the sofas. But though the effects of the hot milk on Chenel were instant, their said effects on Bianca were nil, that is, they didn't work.

Another time, in the same lounge, Troy readied one of the high definition plasma screens before Bianca, saying, "I say the best way for drowsyness is boredom, and everytime I tune into politicians making their speeches on TV, well, that does the trick."

"And what kind of crock of guacamole politicians can do just that?" said Bianca

"Usually Congress people or senators," said Troy, who had tuned into CSPAN as one of the members of Congress was deliviering one of the latest filbusters, which happened to be a debate on a possible lecture of tax hikes. But again, as it was with Chenel and her hot milk, again, Bianca was wide awake, embroiled in the speeches, while Troy dozed off.

"One of the best ways to doze off is through transcendental meditation," said Pierce, who had seated in a lotus pose with Bianca, "and I can assure you that TM can and WILL work. foreven the mots insomiac people like you, rrrral..."

"If it works, just don't take advantage of me in my sleep," warned the spoiled diva, "and no court will convict me."

"Just stay calm and close your eyes...," said the egotist as he did the same, "and repeat after me...om...om...om...om...zzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ..."

The fact that Pierce dozed off and Bianca was still awake, well, it was no wonder the spoiled diva turned and said, "One of you get Sleeping Beauty outa here!"

Next came Radley, who set up a king sized waterbed in the lounge , along with a nightstand with a CD playing boombox, saying, "Believe me, Bianca, nuttin' gets me off to slumberland like the sound of wankelflex crashing waves and with a water bed , it'll feel like you're right there on the ocean."

"Crashing waves?" said Bianca. "You've got sound effects for that, no doubt."

"Sure," said the surfer. "I just got a CD of sound effects, set for Track #31, Ocean Waves. Get on the bed, Bianc, and kick back while listening to the sounds."

"Just don't call me Bianc, OK?!" said the spoiled diva as she laid on the waterbed-no easy task when it came to taking off her Gucci high heels and keeping balance on a waterbed-till she finally laid on the bed, closing her eyes, then a moment of quiet...until-

SCRREEECH-BANG!TINKLE!

Hearing that, Bianca jumped off the bed, screeching, as Radley, nervously chuckled, "Sorry, wrong track-that was Track #13, Auto Hijinks."

"WHAT'RE you trying to do to me," demanded a frustrated Bianca, " put me to sleep or toss me under the bus?!"

"Sorry," said the sheepish surfer, as the spoiled diva got back on the bed, before the boombox started again, with the slow lay sounds of ocean wavas, as Radley rippled the bed to simulate the wave, giving Bianca an interactive feel, as the diva murmured, "All that water...those ocean waves..."

Suddenly, Bianca turned green as a frog in the face, before bolting up and jumping off the bed and running out.

"Bianca, where're you going?" called Radley.

"To the bathroom," replied the spoiled diva in a nauseaous voice, " I've got to puke!"

"Over my dead body," declared Bianca. "I told the likes of you before that I never put my trust in habit forming sleep pills! You trying to turn me into a junkie?"

"Sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures," said Lark, "and besides unlike other sleep pills, Polydichloric Euthimal is by no means habit forming. I've used them when I get insomiac and they've never turned me into a junkie."

They were in the same lounge as before near a sofa, as Lark offered Bianca a red gel capsule and a cup of water, the blonde model adding, "Believe me, Bianca, if you want a sleep pill that doesn't turn you into a junkie and with no side effects, then the Polydichloric Euthimal, trust me, just try it, for me."

"Just don't say I didn't warn you," warned the spoiled diva, taking the capsule and the water, adding, "but if I wind up an addict, you're paying for my rehab costs."

"Sure thing," said Lark. But as before, despite having taken the P.D.E., its effects were total zip for Bianca as she lay on the sofa.

"See?" said the diva. "No effect."

"What went wrong?" said the blonde model. "They're supoosed to be strong."

Against her judgement, it's easy to see what's likely to happen next. In short, Lark took one of the gelcaps with water-

-and donzed off in half a snap of a finger, right on top of an livid Bianca.

Laying on a head shrinker's couch in Mc Tech Labs, which was where Chester lived and worked, Bianca was in doubt as before, even as the boy genius was saying, The way I see it, as to why the other methods didn't work, Bianca, is because I think you're so tense when trying to sleep, like you've got a lot of worries on your mind."

"Me, with a lot of worries?" said the spoiled diva. "I'll say it again: it's all a crock of guacamole. Everyone's got worries; you'd think even with then, people can sleep."

"Strange but true," said Chester. "My other guess is that your adrenalin overrode the effectsof all the other methods-pills, politicians, ocean sounds, TM, and hot milk, and so forth. So, maybe hypnotism might help you to relax."

"Sure, Chester, sure," said a terse Bianca. "So far, all I had were disasterous results-one more can't make a difference."

"Not with what I've got in mind," said the boy genius, who whipped out his hypnotizing eye, and after projecting its enticing light waves over the diva's eyes until she was transfixed in a state of hypnosis. After that, Chester said, "You're in a state of deep hypnosis...you will forget you were ever tense."

"I will forget I was ever tense," said Bianca.

"You will forget you had a lot of worries on your mind," said the genius.

"I will forget I had a lot of worries on my mind," said Bianca.

"You will have less adrenilin that stands in your way." said the boy egghead.

"I will have less andrenilin that stands in my way," said the brat.

"You will sleep easily and I mean right now," said Chester.

"Over my dead body," said the crusty girl, who instantly came out from her trance. "Not with all those worries, my tenseness and high adrenilin on my mind. I don't think you hypnotism can cure that."

Shrugging his shoulders, all the genius could mutter, "Oh well."

Back at Dupree Mansion, a bitter Bianca was checking out the news, her eyes baggy and red when Wilshire entered, saying, "Uh, Bianca, Jillian's here to see you."

"And what would a pipsqueak like her want with me?!" barked the spoiled girl bitterly. "If she's here to cure my insomnia, she's wasting her time, just like all the others."

"Maybe not, said Jillian, who strode in, adding, "You WERE desperate to pay $7000 to anyone that could cure you, right? Well, believe you me, what I've got in mind is one sure fire way that even better than pills, hypnotism, etc, so help me."

Sighing, Bianca turned off the TV, muttering, "What've we got to lose? So how do you plan to cure me, Miracle Worker Jillian Thorndyke III?"

"First lay down on the sofa," said the blonde child. "then close they eyes and only listen to the sound of my voice...let yourself go...drift on the sound of my voice and if it works, you should be just like Pink Floyd."

"Pink Floyd?" echoed the brat.

"Yup-compfortably numb," said the Thorndyke III sibling. "Just concentre on my voice, when I sing a lullaby."

"A lullaby?!" said a surprised Bianca, already getting testy. "Now that takes the cake! You believe you singing to me is going to help me sleep? Besides, don't you think I happen to be, lest we forget, old for something like a lullaby?"

"Sometimes," said Jillian, "the old ways can be the best. Now, do you wish to be cured or not?"

"Sure, Jillian, sure," sighed the tense diva, who laid back. "just give me your worst..."

"Concetrate...," said the blonde child, "just drift off...the only thing you hear is just...my...voice..."

Closing her eyes, Bianca laid on the sofa...before Jillian started to sing, in a voice with crystalline timbres, sounding like a cross between the late Shirley Temple Black and Gayla Peevey: "Let the stars carry you away/to a place above the clouds, yet below the sky/where you can peacefully drowse to slumber/with no care at all to harm you/nor trouble you in the least/for now let your body be free, sleeping deep/until the time is right/to awaken refreshed/and slumber again easily/without anything to stand in your way/and easily awaken again/with no worries..."

Wilshire, who had been transfixed by all that, saw that of all the methods used, it was Jillian's (of all people) that worked, for there on the sofa, was Bianca Dupree, having been racked and troubled by insomnia, sleeping peacefully at last.

"Jillian, it worked!" whispered the servant. "Bianca's finally sleeping! How'd you know that would work?"

"My mom, Jillian Thorndyke II used to sing me to sleep with that same lullaby," replied the Thorndyke III sibling. "I figured desperate times called for desperate measures and that I figured, 'Well, why not?' Besides, like I said to Bianca, sometimes the old ways can be the best."

"I'll say," said Wilshire. "Well, let's head for the next room and call Switchboard we've got a winner-you."

"I won?" said Jillian.

"Seems that way," said the limo driver.

"So of all people to win the challenge and to cure Bianca's sleeplessness," said Switchboard on the BHT network a few days later, "as well as the winner of Lark Tanner's bet for a steak meal at La Crepe, happens to be little Jillian Thorndyke III. Congrats, Jill, you've earned it! Well, stay tuned after a word from our sponsor and I'll be back with an update on the latest Rodeo Drive fashions."

As before, the same people (Troy, Chenel, Chester, Lark, Radley and Pierce) were at The Teenclub's ice cream parlor when they saw the news, Radley and Troy were pensive, Lark and Chenel in a quasi good mood, Chester nonplussed and Pierce disgusted as they saw Switchboard's broadcast; after that; they got to rambling.

"R-r-r-r-r-r-r," grumbled Pierce. "Of all the people to cure Bianca, it had to be my brat of a sibling! Fat lot of good my transcendental meditation did!"

"Tell me all bout it," said Radley glumly. "How was I to know Bianca was seasick from a waterbed with sound effects?"

"Boy," said Troy. "all I can say is even boring speeches from politicians were no match for Bianca."

"I admit," added Chester, "that sometimes there's some things my hypnotism couldn't control."

"But the worst part," said Chenel, "was that Bianca was immune to hot milk. But at least SOMEONE won, and it's good Jillian was the said winner."

"To think a simple lullaby," said Lark, "finally tipped the scales; since then, Bianca's made up for lost time the last few days with the first decent sleep in a long time...and while we're on the subject of Jillian, where is she? It's time for me to treat her for that steak luncheon at La Crepe."

"You rang?" said Jillian, who just showed up. "Sorry I was late but I just put the $7000 I won to a good use-I donated it to The Beverly Hills Homeless Teen Center."

"Yay, JIllian!" said Chenel. "You go, girl, you're a worthy friend to me!"

"And you're a worthy girlfriend to me," said Chester.

"Good girl, Jillian!" chirped Lark. "You're welcome in my inner circle anytime!"

"Way to Go, Jillian!" said Troy. "I am honred to have you as a friend."

"You're wax to the max with me, surfer girl," agreed Radley.

"As much as it hurts me a sting," said a hesitant Pierce, "well done."

"Well, let's go, Jillian," said Lark as she got up and went with the Thorndyke sibling down to the exit; along the way, Jillian asked, "Lark, you sure their filet migon comes with wood flame grilled shrimp scampi?"

"Positive," replied the blonde model.

THE EVER LOVING END

Be advised, some quotes were rmeinecsent of The Kindest Cut Of All

-a440


End file.
